Determined to feel Positive

I made a conscious decision that my word for this week was going to be positive. Normally, I see how the week goes and think about the best word to fit. This week however I decided in advance that my word this week was going to be “Positive”.

Positive

Because, at the end of last week I was feeling decidedly negative. I made the decision to apply to be a Butlins Ambassador, and while I would absolutely love the opportunity, part of me actually feels like I wish I hadn’t gone for it. Why? because they wanted to know all of my blogger stats. Page views, followers etc. In general I try not to think too much about these kinds of things, mainly because whenever you start comparing yourself to others it is easy to fall into the trap of thinking you aren’t doing as well as them. But to apply I had to provide them with this information and I felt like I was doing well enough or something.

For the most part I am really happy with my blog, I love writing it but since being pregnant I have scaled back a little. I have stopped my linky for the time being, and I haven’t been able to commit as much time to it as I previously was. That’s life and a conscious decision I made as I felt I wasn’t managing. I get lots of fantastic comments from lovely readers and I have been happy with that.

courtesy of freedigitalphotos.net

courtesy of freedigitalphotos.net

But having to write my stats and figures down on paper, made me feel lacking. I am the type of person who likes to succeed at what I do. If I am going to do something I want to do it well. Not because I want awards or recognition, but because I like to feel I am doing well at something. Filling out the form made me feel like I wasn’t. Then I kept reading about so many lovely bloggers having a fantastic time at Britmums, and I felt like I was missing out on things that could have helped me improve.

Making a choice

So I had to give myself a bit of a talking to. Remind myself why I am writing the blog and that facts and figures don’t mean anything. Remind myself that I made the decision not to go to Britmums because I couldn’t predict how I would be coping with my pregnancy and SPD. In actual fact I don’t think I could have coped being on my feet that long so it was the right decision not to go. There is no point being upset about something that has happened and is done with.

I  decided that this week was not going to be a negative one. I made a choice, I accepted my feelings but decided to turn them into something positive. I decided to get organised. (I’m not saying this was easy but I was determined to try).

We had a lovely weekend, had some fun at my Mum‘s on Saturday, caught up with some friends and set some Summer Goals to join in with #GetGoodSummer. Then on Monday, as my parents took Monkey to Rhyme Time and I had some me-time, I decided to catch up on getting my blog organised. Sorted out my Kred and Klout-ing as I hadn’t done anything with them for ages. Got some of the many posts I had in my head at least started as drafts. Rather than feeling down about my blog or feel that it was lacking, I decided to take hold of the situation and try to find ways of improving it. At least then I know I am trying my best!

With that done, the rest of the week has had it’s, um, challenges when it came to staying positive. My pelvis has been bothering me a lot, which is a shame, but it just means I need to focus on my exercises and try to make it better. Monday/Tuesday were testing days and I found it quite hard to be positive, as I seem to be reaching the point in pregnancy where sleep is getting harder, and being tired all day was getting me down. Then some cooler weather arrived Tuesday night, I got a much better night’s sleep and I really started to actually feel more positive. I had a lovely time with a friend on Wednesday, started an Aquanatal Yoga class on Wednesday night (more on that to come soon) and Monkey and I had a lovely day in the sun on Thursday.

I’ve also read some fantastic blogs this week about BritMums live, both sharing some of the top tips they got while they were there, (very handy thank you for sharing ladies) but also talking about how it made them feel about their blogs. It reminded me I am not the only one feeling the way that I do sometimes, and made me focus again on why I am doing it and what I really want to get from it. High stats, sponsored posts and freebies to review are lovely perks but they aren’t why I started this post in the first place. As long as I am doing what I set out to do, then I shouldn’t see it as failing.

I don’t know if my stats and figures are improving, and I don’t know if I will be picked as  a Butlins Ambassador, but while I would love it if both of those things were true, even if they aren’t, I am not going to let myself feel too down about it. I am going to keep going as I am and focus on doing the best at this that I can, even if that doesn’t result in me being as successful as some other bloggers. There are things I can do to improve but I am not going to do it at the expense of my sanity or Monkey’s happiness, or my relationship with Hubby. I only have so much time and energy and while my blog is a priority for me (say above housework ;)) it will never be a higher priority than my family.

So coming out of this week I am feeling a lot more positive than I was at the outset, and I am proud of that.

The Reading Residence

19 thoughts on “Determined to feel Positive

  1. Ah, honey, I understand exactly where you’re coming from (except I don’t know what SPD feels like but I can imagine!). I’ve read lots of Britmums posts too and its made me think a lot about what I’m doing with the blog and what I do or don’t want to be doing with it. Yes, the free stuff would be amazing but I don’t want my blog to start feeling like a chore either – I am happy writing about the things that matter to me right now and I’ve slowed down a lot in the last two weeks with linkys and posting in general and you know what? Its been really great – although I’ve still felt completely overwhelmed at times by the number of posts I want to read and comment on, not having to do this every day does leave time for other stuff. I’ve stopped looking at my stats daily and I don’t want to think about that right now. I have a bit of complex about popularity and the popularity of my posts – sometimes not feeling like it is good or interesting enough to lure in bigger bloggers as followers, or stand up to keynote blogging standards – I think that is where my ambition lies – not so much the free stuff of making any money from it. The holiday companies *would* be great to bag though – it would be interesting to know what kind of stats and page views would be enough for a company like Butlins… Fingers crossed for an easing of the SPD and lots more sleep soon :-) X

    • Thanks for such a lovely comment Sam! It is so easy to get dragged down by it all when you start looking into it and I understand why they want to ask but I feel it devalues the blog some what, as if content isn’t as important or something. Glad to hear you are feeling better after taking a few steps back, I think the key is finding a balance that works for you, your life and your family really! Thanks and fingers crossed xx :)

  2. I think it’s really easy to get bogged down the blog world, it can be all consuming and very draining on time and energy-I know I have done it in the past and continue to do so occasionally. What is important to remember is that most of us are blogging for our children and our families, and therefore yes the odd opportunity is AMAZING but at the end of the day for most of us it’s not why we do it. I have to tell myself this sometimes when I get too wrapped up in the community or my stats, or the ‘politics’ of it all! xx

    • You are so right Katie and good to know I am not the only one this happens to! I had to give myself a good talking to and I am sure that I will have to do so again at some point. I love blogging but it is so important to remember why we are doing it and not get bogged down in all of the other stuff! Thanks for the lovely comment! xx

  3. I can totally relate to your feelings about the blog and why you feel the way you do. And tiredness in pregnancy is not pleasant-remeber it well. But I really think you have absolutely the right attitude. Staying positive can be tricky at the best of times when life throws its little curve balls at you, but keeping that positive frame of mind really does make all the difference in the world. I used to deliver self help programmes to people with life long health conditions, and those with a positive outlook generally fared so much better in their lives. It taught me a valuable lesson xx

    • Gosh I bet, it is incredible when people with serious conditions can be so positive isn’t it? Really puts your life in perspective at times. I don;t like feeling miserable or negative in general and so always try to remember how lucky I actually am and not let myself get dragged down by things, not always easy but usually fake it till you make it works quite well too! Glad to know I am not alone in the feelings about my blog, I am in a better place again now and hopefully I will stay that way! xx

  4. I do think deciding to be positive at the outset is a great idea and really makes a difference to me if I’m having a difficult time. As for the comparison and stats – please ignore it! Easy to say, I know, but I enjoy reading your blog, and so many other blogs who get put off by the stats and rankings, and I’d hate to see them stop writing just because of that. As for being upset about having to submit your stats – you don’t know how favourably you compare, so just wait and see. What’s to lose?! You are so right in saying family comes above all else, and it sounds like you’re striking a balance now. It’s really hard to do, believe me, I know! Thanks for sharing with #WotW x

    • Thanks Jocelyn that means a lot and I enjoy my blog too much to stop :) and like you say I guess I don’t know how I compare. I’ve sent it off and will see what they say as you are right, there is nothing to lose. For me I have to at least aim at feeling positive, I don’t like feeling like a misery guts, I mean it can overwhelm us all at times but that’s not how I want to feel! Thanks for hosting :) xx

  5. Well done for staying positive despite the negatives. Having a positive outlook on things makes such a difference, doesn’t it? Don’t worry about those stats. I have not looked into stats at all, have no idea what those two ‘K’ things are and I am sure that in the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t matter that much (or does it?). Sometimes ignorance is the best medicine! What matters is that you enjoy writing your blog.

  6. I also did want to apply to them but when I see my stats I backed out. I also slowed down a bit from the blog and concentrated a bit on my family. I concentrated on it for a bit but it ate big chunk of my time. Now I am looking for balance. Hopefully I can find it. Your blog is awesome and seeing how many people loves it and comments on it is a proof that it is nice. Its nice that you feel positive =) #wotw

    • This is it, it can take up all of your time if you let it, and I can’t, I have to find a balance somehow. Thank you so much for the lovely comments, that is what I try and focus on more than stats! It works, most of the time :) xx

  7. I’m glad that you’ve finished the week feeling more positive, good for you! I’ve taken a bit of a break too, it was all getting a bit much, couldn’t keep up! There’s no point in doing it if you’re not enjoying it xx

    • Thanks lovely and you are totally right, when it feels like a chore or just overwhelming you just have to take a step back and remember why you are doing it i think! xx

  8. I think the words “successful blogger” mean different things to different people. For me, being a successful blogger is not about getting freebies, because that’s not my reason for blogging. For me a successful blogger is someone who writes well (and sadly I have come across many badly written blogs, some very “successful” in terms of numbers of followers, which is inexplicable to me) and whose work people like to read. I’m still working on getting people to read my writing, but I know that my blog makes (some!) people laugh and I’m happy with that.

Thanks for taking the time to write something. I love comments and read every one xx

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