Word of the Week – Testing

That’s right this week has been

testing

It didn’t get off to the best of starts with the terrifying ordeal that was Saturday Night, and unfortunately the stress and worry and lack of sleep has leached over and affected the rest of the week.

Despite minimal sleep on Saturday after our ambulance trip to the hospital we still had work to do on Sunday. Monkey was out of danger and we had hired some heavy duty (and costly) equipment for the garden renovation and we knew that work had to go on despite our tiredness so that we didn’t waste the money. It was positive and a lot has been achieved – more on that next week, but the exhaustion has permeated our week.

And let’s face it, when you’re tired, everything feels more difficult.

Monkey has really been testing me this week. He is becoming defiant and obstropulous at times. Normally I know I would cope with it better but when I am tired and not feeling myself, I find it harder to deal with. We have been lucky with him so far and other than firm “Nos” and explaining why he can’t do something, we haven’t had to venture into the realm of discipline. But I think we may be approaching something along the lines of the naughty step, because he just doesn’t listen and needs to understand that there are consequences if he disobeys or refuses to listen to mummy or daddy. no fun and we will see how we go, not making rash decisions, but we knew this day would come.

I’m also feeling, pretty selfishly, that I need a break. With all the work on the garden over the last month, all of Monkey’s care has fallen onto me as Hubby has had a lot to do in the garden. I understand and it’s been fine but I feel like I need a break. I know I’m lucky with how much hubby helps out with him normally, and not sure what it says about me as a mother that I am struggling, but I am struggling and I need a bit more help. Thankfully though we have a quiet weekend planned and hubby is very much looking forward to spending a bit more time with Monkey, phew!

We’ve also been a bit tested by other matters this week. The tenants are moving out of the flat I used to live in before I met hubby, and we’ve just found out that they have led it get damp and mouldy which is a real pain. I lived there for years with no damp, but in the two years they have lived there this is the second time. I don’t understand to be honest but I guess it’s a good thing they are moving out.

We were thinking that we would like to sell the flat rather than rent it out again, as I hate it hanging over our heads, but now we are not sure that is going to happen yet. It is leasehold and we’ve found the deeds and realised that there is only 61 years left on the lease, which basically means it’s hard for anyone to get a mortgage on it. To extend the lease is a process that takes 6 months – a year and costs in our case, wait for it, about £15,000. Yup £15,000. Which we don’t exactly have, just lying around. But it needs to be done as the costs will only increase as the remaining lease decreases. So we need to get tenants in there again after all while we get the process started.

We are hoping that we can add the costs onto the existing mortgage of the flat as otherwise we don’t know how we are going to finance it, and hopefully we can then recoup some of the costs when we do sell it, whenever that may be.

We just don’t need the hassle, to be honest. it’s just a pain but then life is like that, it’s not easy and there’s never a good time for something like this to crop up. It is a bit of a testing time and puts a strain on things. I got really cross with hubby yesterday, like fuming mad for no real reason other than over-tiredness, stress and frustration.

I like to think I am a positive person but I am struggling to find the positives this week. Here’s hoping next week is better. What word sums up your week? Hope it’s happier than mine!!

The Reading Residence

35 thoughts on “Word of the Week – Testing

  1. I also felt a bit tired reading this. You are not selfish for wanting to have a break. It re-energized you to help you tackle all these events. I am a tenant and now I need to check the house for moulds. I like it that I saw what the owners thinks.

    Rest (if you can find time). Breath. Hopefully things will get better from here.

    • Thank you, I am hoping for a bit of rest this weekend, to try and get back to feeling like myself again and then I know I will be able to tackle it all. Thank for the very kind comment xx

  2. I’m not surprised you’re exhausted! Sounds like a very trying week from so many angles and I really don’t blame you for dreaming of escape. Sometimes being a grown up is so rubbish! Hope things get better for you soon and start to work out a bit and let you get some rest. Take care #WotW

    • Thank you for the very kind words, Being a grown up really is rubbish sometimes! Hoping to get a rest at the weekend so I can be a bit more positive next week! xx

  3. This does sound testing. Like you say, you had a tough start and tiredness will get you every time. As to the discipline, I think you’ve done well to get Monkey this far without it! Little Man’s a few months younger and he knows about the naughty step, and knows the word ‘no’, though tends to laugh in the face of it! And needing a break says nothing about you as a mummy, just that you need a break! As do we all from time to time.
    We had this with our flat when we sold it a few years ago, though I was well aware of it, as I worked in the mortgage & property industry. It is such a pain. You should be able to add it to the mortgage, if there’s enough equity, or cash buyers are unaffected by it (which you may attract for further BTLs), though of course the flat’s value will be lower without the extension. Hope you sort it, and really hoping you have a better week next week x Thanks for sharing with #WotW

    • Thank you for being so kind! Hopefully I will get a break this weekend and will be able to tackle things a bit better next week, it all feels insurmountable at the moment but I know we will get there, just one step at a time! xx

  4. Tiredness makes everything seem so much harder to manage so don’t be too harsh on yourself at all. You’re having a fair few things to test you at the moment so I don’t blame you for feeling fed up. Hang in there with Monkey-we try the counting down from 5-1 thing. If my son doesn’t do as he’s told by the time I get to 1 there are serious consequences (although I’ve never had to put them into use as we’ve never got that far. Actually, I’m not sure I’d know what to say, maybe no ice cream!) Hand in there xx

    • Thank you, I know things will improve, just seem to be in a downward slump at the mo. The 5-1 thing is interesting and a few people have said it works well. I just wonder what I would say if I got t number 1!! hehe xx

  5. Oh dear. You’ve had one hell of a week haven’t you.

    Hopefully you will have a better time next week. In terms of discipline, definitely better to set your boundaries now.

    Popping across from Word of the Week.

    • Thank you, yep I think you are right, we have been lucky so far but he needs boundaries so we should probably set them! xx

  6. If I was a SAHM all the time I would be desperate for a break! My breaks generally come in the shape of office work! I’ve always been rubbish at disciplining too and am ashamed to say that I’ve given in to demands in the past – anything for a quiet life! – but its like they say, making a rod for your own back and all that. I always had a fear of buying anything leasehold but I didn’t really know why until my sister and brother in law had the same thing with theirs, needing to spend over £10000 to bump up the lease. I hope you get it all sorted and get a bit of a break and some calm in the coming week. #WotW X

    • Thank you, hopefully if I get a bit of a break this weekend I won’t feel so weighed down by it all. I know we’ll get there but it feels really hard to see it right now. See I am stubborn so I don’t like to give in, but so is he so I think he needs a consequence other than me just taking him away from what he wants. We will see how we get on! xx

    • Thank you, hoping to get a bit of a break tomorrow which should hopefully improve things – aiming for a more positive word next week! xx

  7. Sorry your week has been testing. I am a sahm and can sympathise with wanting a break. Now that the weather is good my hubby wants to be in the garden all weekend too so I know that everything can get on top of you sometimes. Hope you have a better week x

    • Thank you for being so kind, it can be really difficult but with not much planned this weekend hopefully I will get a bit of a break and therefore feel a bit more positive! xx

  8. Yikes, that is one heck of a week… Really hope you do get your well-earned break.

    Really empathise too with the looming discipline dilemma. My little boy is only 16mths but he can be a real terror sometimes! Everything from general naughtiness (where it’s hard not to laugh!) to whacking me quite hard.. At the moment we also just use firm “no”s, as well as diversion and avoidance strategies… But yes more actual discipline will probably be needed soon… Good luck!
    #wotw

    • thank you :) Hmm yes sounds similar to where we are at with Monkey, good luck, we will see how we both get on! xx

  9. So glad monkey is out of danger! I can totally relate to your #WotW! Testing is pretty much a word I would describe my two with a fair bit! I hope you soon get some respite x

  10. Gosh, that really has been a testing week :( I really sympathise on the leasehold thing. I had a flat in London and the Freeholder was awful, in the end me and the other owners got together and bought the freehold, this ultimately made the properties far more marketable and I managed to sell mine while the freehold was being finalised (discounting the price of my share of the freehold). Anyway, I hope you get that all sorted out without too much stress and that next week is much better xx #WotW

    • Thank you, oh I can imagine that would have been great! Potentially difficult to arrange though! Thank you, fingers crossed! xx

  11. Oh dear, what a week you have had… When we are sleep deprived, everything seems so much more difficult. At least your hubby can take over a bit with Monkey this week-end and hopefully you can have some ‘me’ time to relax, have a bath, read a book or just sleep. Look after yourself. Mel #WotW

    • Thank you, you really do have to just take some time for yourself occasionally! Hopefully next week will be better :) xx

  12. Pingback: Word of the week 28.03.14 Better | Becoming a Stay at Home Mum

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