It has been just over a month since Little Miss arrived and well and truly became part of our family. As gorgeous as she is though, life with a newborn can be really hard, and exhausting. For all parents to be, here is some of the things you should know about life with a newborn (and for those of you who are already parents, I wonder if this will ring any bells!)
Pooing
Newborn babies poo, a LOT. Quite often at inopportune times. For example:
If you go for a walk, they will do a poo within 5 minutes of you leaving the house and then scream for the remainder of the outing.
They will poo and wee when you take their nappy off. Spraying you and themselves and the surrounding area. Remember to keep your head out of the line of fire at all times.
They will poo as soon as you have finished getting them dressed from the previous nappy change, meaning you have to start the change all over again.
Sleep
You will find yourself doing anything to get your baby asleep, and keep them that way. Rocking, bouncing, shushing, patting, letting them suck your finger till it goes all pruney, using white noise, holding them up to an extractor fan… a combination of all of the above… A twitter friend was thinking about putting a clock in the Moses basket (like you would with a with a dog) to see if that helped as her son slept better on her. When she told me this she was sat in the dark in the afternoon, not daring to move to even turn on the lights as her baby was finally snoozing on her.
Trapped!
If you find a combination that works you may think they are fast asleep after what seems like hours of rocking, but the second you dare to sit down with them, or heaven forbid, attempt to lay them in their Moses basket, they will wake up immediately.
You may think you know where all the creaky floorboards are, finding a route across the floor, only for a new one to appear right at crucial moment waking up the baby that finally seemed to be asleep,
If you do manage to get them off to sleep, they will know when you are about to eat and they will wake up and scream until you pick them up. Thus forcing you to attempt the food and baby juggle, eating rapidly cooling food with one hand while trying to soothe with the other. You will become quite adept at one handed eating, though it is easier if you have some helping cutting the food up!
You and your partner will get irritable. Nothing like exhaustion at 4am with a baby who has been wide awake and insisting on being held for the last couple of hours to bring out the worst in you. You will feel like it is a competition, who is the most tired and therefore whose turn it is to try and grab a little sleep? There will also be competitions over whose back/arms/legs ache the most from the endless rocking and carrying!! Which parent is suffering the most? The parent out at work all day and then coming home to deal with toddler and baby, or the one who is dealing with the baby and toddler ALL day! Remember it is not a competition and actually having that conversation does not lead to good things!
Other People’s Opinions
Other people will have opinions about everything you do and you will be asked some daft questions.
Molly from Mother’s Always Right recently wrote a great post about one such question – “Is baby good?” . How can a baby be good or bad? Some babies cry more than others, this doesn’t make them bad and isn’t a reflection of your parenting. If you have a baby who doesn’t cry much you are lucky and if you have one who cries a lot it doesn’t make you a bad parent, they are just babies and they are not all the same.
Are you in a routine? At 2 wks post birth, um, no are you kidding? I wish!
In general everyone has advice, from what they did with their child. It’s nearly always well-meaning as they want to help but all babies are different, and you know I actually find it more useful when you just empathise with me rather than suggesting things to try, because lets face it I have google at my disposal and have pretty much tried everything. Just because something worked for your baby, doesn’t mean it will work for mine.
One other thing – your baby may scream all night and drive you mad, but you can guarantee that when you have visitors or see people, they will be fast asleep with a butter wouldn’t melt expression. This leaves people to think you are being something of a drama queen, exaggerating the screaming. It is good fun though when those people get to witness the crying for themselves. Oh, exaggerating were we? Imagine that at 3am!
I know some people love the baby days but they can be seriously challenging too. For me it is a case of grit your teeth and get through it, and try to enjoy your baby a little too 🙂
Lovely and honest post – glad to see she’s looking so well.
Lizzie’s Daily Blog
Oh yes, so very true. We had many of those 4am competitions about who was the most sleep deprived and there really are no winners. The question about whether the baby is ‘good’ always used to drive me mad. Great post – hope you all start getting some more sleep soon x
oooh she is so scrummy, I can’t wait to meet my little one after looking at your pics!! Lovely words and i agree to all of the above with my two girls, I am getting quite excited about our new arrival following Little Miss’ progress and reading your posts but I have a few months to go yet, I remember the floor pacing and being trapped feeling well, though I worry about having the other two around the house, will the baby ever get any sleep with them around, overtired baby, no thanks!!
Aww they will be here before you know it! I understand the worries about baby sleeping though, is hard enough with one older sibling! Xx
Gosh it now makes me shudder a bit and thank the Lord I don’t have to go through it all again!! It’s a good job they’re so gorgeous isn’t it?!!!
I didn’t know putting a clock in a dog’s bed was a thing! Did it work? I tried everything with JJ too – I think you’re right, with a colicky baby there’s no real solution but grin and bear it. Also it’s not helpful when people say ‘it’s such a short period of time’ because I well remember that every day felt like a year! It was easier with EJ just because JJ needed attention then and it was a distraction from the relentlessness – I hope Monkey is being equally distracting (in a good way!!) thanks for linking up to #thetruthabout hon xxx
Lol nor did I to be honest, not sure if she actually did it or if it worked! 🙂 every day really does feel like a year and I am grateful for monkey distracting me and having fun, but its hard when I am desperately trying to get her to sleep and he is being noisy. Not his fault but not a great combination! Xx
Oh my goodness, look at that gorgeous little face! I had forgotten so much of this….or buried it in the past 😉 It brought back so many memories, especially the bit about everyone else having advice on every single thing. So irritating and very confusing for mum! You’re obviously doing something very right so keep up the good work 🙂
Oh, this does indeed bring back memories. I have always tried hard not to offer advice unless it’s asked for…! Much as I miss baby cuddles, I am very glad that I don’t have to go through this stage again 🙂 #thetruthabout
So many memories!! Those first few weeks are something different, that’s for sure! I remember feeling a combination of overwhelming exhaustion and overwhelming love that seemed so confusing at the time! Looking back, a lot of my favorite memories came from those early moments with my daughter.
She’s adorable! We are back in that newborn baby zone – our newest little boy is 8 days old so I feel every single one of these points! #sundaystars
Aww congratulations! The newborn baby stage certainly can be hard work! Xx
Love this post, I’ve just written a similar one about the reality of life with a newborn. It’s all so true x
This is all so true. I recognise so much from when Little Miss was tiny. I definitely remember lying in a dark room for hours barely daring to breathe because Little Miss had finally got off of her nap. And the competitions on who is most tired sound familiar too. This also extended to my NCT friends. Thanks for linking up to #SundaysStars. Hugs Mrs H xxxx