My word this week is control, because we are taking back control of our lives. With all of the illness last week it was all too easy to wallow and feel like the helpless victim of a rubbish situation. I decided to focus on the positives first of all (I do wallow sometimes, I am only human, but it actually really bugs me) and then I decided to take control of the situation. Ok so I can’t stop the kids or hubs getting ill with bugs, I wish I could, particularly when they happen at unfortunate times. But there are things I can do, and hubs can do, to make our lives a little easier.
February, in the run up to the wedding, was a really busy month and bugs didn’t make things any easier. but it is now March, we have a lot less planned so it is time for a bit of a fresh start. I just hope we can all be well for it! (Monkey has come down with Chicken Pox since I started writing this post, so we may have to wait a little longer for us all to be well.)
First of all, we moved LM from Lactose Free to normal formula. Thankfully she has been absolutely fine on it, no more lactose issues, yay, and it is helping her poo etc. so no more worries on that front either, phew! Then the biggest thing for us is that we have decided to take control and get her routine sorted. We have always taken a pretty relaxed baby led approach, and I remember doing this with Monkey and it eventually all just slotting in to place. With LM though it has not remotely slotted into place and she is just all over the show and I don’t think it is helping her, and it is certainly not helping me!
So I got out our trusty friend, Dr Ferber‘s book and read what he had to say. As always he is pretty common sense and says that it is hard for babies to get into a rhythm if they have naps at completely different times every single day. So although we have been hoping to tap in to her natural rhythm and go with that, I think we have gone too far the other way and have potentially lost any natural rhythm she had. So this week we have made a decision for what we think are sensible wake up times and nap times and are enforcing them.
That is actually a really harsh way of saying it, we haven’t just picked times off the top of our head but picked what seem to be fairly regular times for her and by consistently putting her down and waking her up at those times (or near enough, we aren’t being 100% rigid to the clock, but we put her down even if she doesn’t seem tired or hasn’t woken up herself) we are encouraging and reinforcing those patterns. I am loathe to say too much and jinx us but so far it is going ok. There has been difficult moments and deciding to do it when both Monkey and I are poorly may not be the best time but when it works it makes life so much easier so I am clinging on to that really!
The hope is that if her routine can be a bit more regular, then everything can calm down a bit. I will know when I have time to plan activities with Monkey, when is sensible to arrange to meet other friends with kids so I can stop being a hermit. It should also mean I can get a bit more organised with the housework too, in theory! Too much that I plan to do just doesn’t happen with things the way they have been and so much revolved around what she was up to and that will still be the case, though if it can be a tiny bit more predictable it would make things so much easier!
I have let go of the diet at the moment. Just while we are all poorly, I can’t cope. I know eating for comfort isn’t necessarily sensible but I am exhausted and eating good food makes me happy. I am not going crazy and if anything am trying to make sure we all eat more vegetables and healthy food, but I am pausing my diet for a few weeks, to pick up again when we are all well. It may seem as though I am giving up, but I actually feel that I am taking control of that situation too as I won’t be constantly berating myself for indulging in a treat when I am feeling low. I will get down to the size I want to be, but I need to be in the right frame of mind to do it. I need to be sleeping well and feeling rested.
I have taken back control of my blog after letting things slip last week. I have finally replied to all of the emails and have a couple of cool things going on – one being my fab Mother’s Day Giveaway for a £50 E Voucher with Custom Canvas – please make sure you check that out! I am way behind on replying to everyone’s lovely comments so thank you to everyone that has commented recently and i am going to try and reply to as many as I can!
So things aren’t perfect. I have a horrible sore throat, Monkey now has chicken pox so we are going to be stuck at home a bit more (thank goodness for our garden as at least we can get out there to burn off some energy as he starts to get better) but I feel like we are getting on top of things. We are taking control of the situation.
Glad you feel like you are taking back control and trying to get into a routine that works for you all. Hope you and Monkey both feel better soon x
Thank you and fingers crossed! xx
I remember felling very similar to you after my son was born. My daughter seemed to naturally fit into her routine, whereas my son appeared to be all over the place. I wonder how much of it is the second child experience, I’m not really sure. But I did end up doing both ‘enforcing’ and relaxing simultaneously! It worked eventually, after trial and error. For me it was simply about finding a routine that worked for us all, even if to me it didn’t actually feel much of a routine at times-looking back it was, it just wasn’t what I’d have chosen (if this makes any sense?!) I do hope the chickenpox isn’t too bad and you are feeling more settled soon x
Yeah it may be… glad you found what worked and I think we are on the right track though I am trying to be as relaxed about it as possible and not stress when things deviate from the routine we are building! xx
Sounds like you’re feeling much more positive, and taking ‘control’ now. I think having some sort of routine that allows you to plan more will make you feel much better, good plan. Hope Monkey doesn’t suffer too much, and that then LM gets through it OK. It’s going round everyone here, too, though my two had it a couple of years ago. We went for Piriton and porridge baths, which both seemed to help xx Thanks for sharing with #WotW
Well done for taking control of things, I bet it feels great too! Hope you all feel better soon.xx
It’s a tough time eh? But glad you taking control back and hopefully LM will get into a routine soon and the bugs will get lost! She looked so cute on FB the other day it was ridiculous ️xx #wordoftheweek
Thanks lovely, those photos were so cute weren’t they? it is a good job babies are cute with the hard work they cause though 😉 I feel better just being in control a bit more and thankfully, touch wood, etc, etc, Monkey is coping really well with the chicken pox and isn’t too poorly in himself so just hope that continues! xx
If getting into a routine helps you to gain back some control it sounds like an excellent idea. I hope Monkey is feeling better soon, chicken pox is the pits x #wotw
I hope you all feel better soon.
Oh hon I hope you feel great for gaining control. As you know I was in a similar place recently and realised that my frame of mind was the thing that needed changing most. Incredible difference it makes.
Really pleased to hear that LM’s lactose issues have passed, and I’m keen to hear more about getting her into a routine. It’s so much harder second, third time around.
Big hugs hon, have a fab weekend xxx
It’s great you are taking control!
I hope you all feel better soon x
Sounds like things are going to be much calmer and ordered in your family from now on! Hope you’re all feeling better soon xx
I wonder if this routine thing is a girl thing or possibly a second child thing. Little E never had a routine and Ethan gave us a routine. We also took control at about 6 months when we moved her into her cot. We also find she doesn’t sleep for that long, she wakes after ten minutes but we have now discovered if we leave her she might possibly fall asleep again. Sorry to hear that Monkey has chicken pox, at least you are getting it out of the way. When Ethan had it we all had sore throats, not sure if that is a connection. Hope you are onwards and upwards now x x
Nice to hear such good news! You are the boss. Hope that Monkey will get better soon too =) #wotw
Oh you’re doing brilliantly – and definitely sounds like you’re taking back control 🙂 You’ll have ups and downs of course, as you know, but just feeling more confident about it will help you manage everything. I hope everything continues so positively! Mim @ http://www.mamamim.com #MaternityMonday
Thanks lovely, I have to admit I’ve had a wobble and seem to have lost control this week, hopefully I will get it back though! xx