“I Don’t Know” – 23 months

“I Don’t Know” is Monkey’s latest favourite phrase, and to all of his family, it is the most wonderful sound in the world. He is a fairly late talker, although at not yet 2 it’s not like he is massively delayed, but compared to some of friends’ children who have been speaking since before they were even 1, it has felt like a big delay.

We’ve also worried that it was our fault in some way. We have read books to him since he was tiny, spoken to him about everything, sung songs every day, taken him to groups, done everything we could, and yet we never even had so much as a ‘mama’ or ‘dada.’ When I heard about health visitors praising the parents when a toddler has an excellent vocabulary, I panicked a little inside that in contrast then there must be something we weren’t doing right, fro him not to be saying any actual words.

I was consoled by the fact that he clearly understood so much of what we were saying, and many people said that it may be because he was such an early walker. His speech did gradually change and improve and I stopped worrying so much as I could tell that we were nearly there, though still didn’t know how long that would take.

Then a couple of months ago we were rewarded with his first word “go” and loved it. Since then he has added more words to his list, though not tonnes, but all random really. He still doesn’t really say mummy or daddy in any way shape or form, but he says go, sings row row row (for row, row the boat), says shoo to birds and sheep (learnt that one of the TV I think!) and says a few other words too occasionally, though not as frequently.

Not too long ago he started saying “oh dear” which we thought was lovely and he has now mastered the word “no” whereas he previously just shook his head. We are getting there with yes but it is a bit on and off. Then one day last week I was explaining to Monkey that we were going to collect his friend and that she was going to come in the car with us, as I didn’t want him to get upset by the unusual occurrence. He was looking at me very confused so I asked him “do you understand?” I don’t know why I asked, I wasn’t expecting a response but I always try and talk to him as if he is going to respond. Anyway, he just said three lovely words ” I don’t know.” Just once, but so clear, and my heart melted. He said it loads that day and melted Daddy’s heart too when he come home.

He just says it in the right context every time, you ask him a question and it is met with “I don’t know” in a variety of different tones! What do you want for lunch? “I don’t know.” What do you want to do? “I don’t know.” What does it feel like? “I don’t know.” It really has made us wonder if it something we say a lot to each other, and I guess it must be!

I think it is so special because we have been waiting so long for him to talk, and I guess that because it is more than one word, it really feels like you’re having a conversation, which obviously has never happened until this point! I don’t know whether it feels more magical to us because we’ve waited so long for it, or if we would have been just as soppy about it had he spoken earlier!

Over this weekend we have seen numerous members of our family who have all been treated to the same heart melting sound. There have been tears from a couple of his grandparents, and obvious pride from all his other family members to hear it.

His grandpops got a bit teary when Monkey said "I'don't know" at the restaurant

His grandpops got a bit teary when Monkey said “I’don’t know” at the restaurant

I’ve tried to catch it on video a couple of times, and he does say it here, but well, it doesn’t sound quite as good as when he says it more normally. I suppose he isn’t a performing seal though after all! I actually love his tone the last time daddy asks him in this clip, it’s like “I’ve already told you I don’t know, stop asking daddy!”



Ethans Escapades

Family Day at the Zoo

We are really lucky to have all of our immediate family really close by, which means we see them really regularly. We are also really lucky to have a fab little zoo, called Hamerton ZooPark, within about a half hour drive of us. We’ve been once already this year and because they offer a great value season ticket, no doubt this won’t be my last post about it either!

It is such a great place, but it opened *I think* in 1990 and would have been a lot smaller then, so wasn’t somewhere either hubby or I went to as kids. But both of us had been as adults and it is a fave place for us. My parents though, had never been, so this Easter Monday, when talking about what to do as a nice day out together, we decided they really needed to see how great it is! My little bro and his lovely girlfriend love it there too and really wanted to come for a fun day with Monkey.

The other option for the day was a local farm, but last year Monkey was terrified of the noisy sheep and while I do want to take him back, I thought avoiding sheep may be safest for a stress free family day out!

We really lucked out with the weather as it was such a glorious day! Monkey was dead excited at just being able to run around with some of his favourite people there to play with him!

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He was also really brave and stroked a donkey, and a goat! Clever Monkey!

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I also took my big camera this time, and managed to get some nice snaps of some of the lovely animals!

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It was a lovely time of year to go too as there was some gorgeous baby animals! I loved the baby meerkats!

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And we saw this gorgeous baby wallaby emerging from his mumma’s pouch, and then jump right back in again!

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Monkey loved seeing all the animals..

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But I think he loved spending time with his family more than anything!

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Overall it was just such a lovely day in the sun!

Country Kids from Coombe Mill Family Farm Holidays Cornwall





Family fun over Easter

My word of the week this week is Family. For a couple of reasons, one being that with the long Easter weekend, we spent a lot of time with both sides of our family, having a lot of fun. But also because with my birthday being right after the weekend, Daddy took a couple of extra days off work so we have had 6 whole days having fun as a little family of 3.

So, what have we been up to?

On Good Friday we went to a local garden centre with hubby’s family, Monkey had no idea that we were meeting any of his favourite people there and he honestly got so excited when he saw his grandparents, his uncles and his aunt. I wish I could have captured that excitement a bit better than I have but you can hopefully get the idea from these pictures of him dragging his grandparents around the shop!

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Monkey was also in mega cute mode as he was cuddling some of little animal statues, he is so into cuddling everything at the moment bless him!

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Easter Sunday was another family day as we popped round to my parent’s house in the morning to visit them and my auntie who was up from London. Monkey loved dragging Daddy and his grandparents off to play with cars, while Mummy got to have a nice sit down, yay!

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Then Sunday evening we headed to Hubby’s parent’s for dinner – Hubby’s Grandma, or Umuma, was from Singapore so curry is more traditionally their Sunday meal, so we went for a very yummy Easter Sunday Curry! Again Monkey loved all of the attention he got from all his family and actually had some lovely moments bonding with his Great Grandpa, who he can be a bit nervous of sometimes. So that was very lovely too!

Monday was a trip out to one of our favourite local zoos, Hamerton Wildlife Centre, and I took more than enough photos to fill a whole post so will write a separate one about that, though he had so so much fun with his Nanny, Grandpops, Uncle Mark and Auntie Fran, it was just lovely 🙂

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Tuesday I got a day off (hurrah) as Daddy took Monkey to tumbletots and then started his creative challenge of making me a birthday card with Monkey 🙂 I had a lovely peaceful day while Daddy and Monkey got some Daddy Son time going on 🙂

Wednesday was my birthday so we headed to Cambridge to do a bit of shopping and just enjoy the sunshine really! After getting a bit bored of shopping we gave Monkey a lovely run around with Daddy in the park, and he had a whale of a time, and was a good boy for the rest of the shopping trip, and I got a few lovely treats! Yay! 🙂

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Thursday Daddy was back to work so that’s where the family time ended, but we really had such a lovely time, and Monkey has been so happy getting so much attention from Daddy, and the rest of his extended family!

The final exciting thing to note is that today (Friday) we have our scan, so we will get to see the newest member of our family for the first time! Eek! Exciting, and obviously fingers crossed that all is well :).

What’s your word of the week?

The Reading Residence
Family Photo Friday @ Thursday's Child, Friday's Thoughts

Feeling the Support

After an insanely busy week last week, this week has been much calmer, and thank goodness as I really needed it to be. There has been lots more positivity this week too so that was nearly my Word of the Week, but instead I have gone for “Support” and I will tell you why.

Regular readers will know about the ups and downs I have had with my pelvis so far in this pregnancy, and I have basically been in a lot of pain due to a lack of support in that region. But on Monday morning I met my new physio who was wonderful and positive and supportive and she has made the world of difference already. I won’t go into too much detail here, but I have written more about it in my week 10 update, if you would like to read more.

One thing I will mention though is that I now have a rather fetching support brace, which is MUCH better than anything I have had before, in that it actually supports my pelvis. It’s not a miracle cure of course and the pain isn’t miraculously gone, but I have felt able to do more with Monkey this week. I haven’t been shying away from walks to the park for fear of the pain I would be in. I have been able to wear the support and have it take some of the strain for me and allow me to be more of the Mum I want to be. Yay!

The other reason I have chosen the word support is because my friends have been so supportive of me lately too, and I feel very very lucky to have such lovely supportive friends. They are a relatively new group of friends, we all met working in the same office and we have really got close since we all had children fairly close in age. I popped round to see one of them for a play date last Friday and I was feeling particularly low. I was in a lot of pain and was so tired after a busy week, but I needed to get out of the house with Monkey.

One thing I always worry about is being that annoying person who is constantly moaning. Growing up my Dad used to moan about his back allll the time, to everyone, and I would see people’s eyes glaze over as he banged on and on about it without ever asking anyone else how they were. I would never want to be thought of the way that I know he was. But it’s a balance because I don’t want to be a martyr either and not tell people who are close to me when I am suffering.

So I was at my friend’s and she knew bits of what was going on, but not all and she wanted to know how I was. I still held back a little though and at one point apologised to her for being such a moaning minnie. She looked at me and said “Seriously Caroline, You don’t have to be happy all the time. This is rubbish and you’re allowed to be miserable, and I want to know how you really are!” I think I cried a little (I blame pregnancy hormones) and spilled. And you know what, I felt so much better for it. I worry too much sometimes and need to trust people more.

As a group we went out for dinner on Tuesday and had a lovely time (even though our food took nearly and hour and a half and we didn’t get to eat until 9pm! Shocking service!) and again just felt really lucky to have a great group of friends and they were all so happy for me that the physio went well on Monday. There was lots of fun and giggles all evening and it was just lovely.

My husband and our families have been so supportive too and been rallying around to play with Monkey and get some of the housework done that I can no longer do, and overall I am just feeling like the pressure has lifted. The combination of being able to physically do a bit more because of my support belt, and feeling supported by friends and family has made for a much nicer week.

I think the fact that the week has been calmer and full of early nights has really helped too though! So there we have it, my word of the week is “Support.” What’s yours?

The Reading Residence
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Back to the beginning…

As of Friday the truth is out, it is now common knowledge that we are pregnant (just over 9 weeks now)! As there are bound to be a number of pregnancy related posts over the next 7 months or so I thought I should start at the beginning. If I am documenting this pregnancy I’m going to do it properly!

We always knew we wanted more than one child, and even though the reality of having a child is sometimes much harder than you ever realise before you have one, we haven’t changed our mind. Different things work for different people and of course I understand not everyone is fortunate enough to have a second (or even a first) child, but, for us, purely on a personal level, we haven’t felt our family is complete. Lovely yes, but not complete. Hubby says he feels like a couple with a baby, as opposed to a family with a couple of kids.

On crutches at 8 mths - look at the size of me!

On crutches at 8 mths – look at the size of me!

Initially we thought we’d like a 2 year gap between babies, but with my problems in my first pregnancy we thought a 2 1/2 to 3 year gap would be better as Monkey would be that bit older and able to do a bit more for himself should I become immobile! We started trying after Christmas and tried to be open minded about how long it may take. We fell pregnant with Monkey incredibly easy (within a month) and had to prepare ourselves that the same might not happen again. Nevertheless we were disappointed when I wasn’t pregnant immediately. I know it’s daft but on some level, even though we knew how unlikely it was, we hoped to get pregnant straight away again.

We re-evaluated and re-steeled ourselves that it may take some time. As it happened though, it didn’t and I fell pregnant the second month of trying. Bonkers and I know we are incredibly lucky! We knew before I was due on because my boobs (which grew to humongous proportions last time) started to grow. Hubby also felt a rise in my body temperature and remembered the same happening last time. But we didn’t want to be too hopeful!

Pregnant yay!

Pregnant yay!

We’d jumped the gun the previous month with early pregnancy tests so this time we were determined to wait until the day I was due on. At first Hubby wanted me to wait for a week after missing a period before taking the test, but I knew I couldn’t wait that long! On the morning  I was due on we talked and decided to take the test. No hesitation on either side, he was as excited as me. I took the test and yep, pregnant. So excited, I ran upstairs to tell hubby. Feeling thrilled.

But soon the fear and worry set in. Hubby was being all tiggerish, bouncing around the house with a huge smile on the face, gushing about how happy he felt. I loved it and part of me was with him… but another part felt terrified. My stomach was in knots and I struggled to feel excited. I kept thinking about what may go wrong, and was scared to be excited in case it does. I don’t trust life to be kind, things go wrong all the time and I’m not someone who thinks “It’ll never happen to me” I think “It could happen to me, I’d better be prepared in case it does.”

I also felt nervous about what this means to our lives. This baby is so wanted, so loved already, we had been trying and it is the perfect timing we hoped for in terms of Monkey’s age…. but it still means a lot of changes. I hated being pregnant before and hope I don’t feel the way I felt last time. I worry how my pregnancy will affect Monkey. What if I get to the point where I can’t walk again?

Monkey’s life is going to change so much. It’s what we want, so he isn’t spoilt by the constant attention of two doting parents, but I can’t help but feel for him. He’s had us at his beck and call for his whole life, and now there will be another member of our family to think about. Another child to share things with. I know it’s a good thing but I am nervous about it.

I guess I need to worry less. Kids are resilient and if I do become more immobile I am sure he will cope. Hubby keeps reminding me that it’s only for a few months so I have to hold on to that if things do get bad! As for having to share some attention, we already try to encourage him to be independant and to share, as both are so important, so hopefully this will help prepare him for the arrival of a sibling. Plus it will be lovely to watch them grow together, to play (and fight) and talk (and argue).

I am still nervous, but I am also very excited and looking forward to this new chapter of our lives as a family!

How did you find out you were pregnant? Is your family complete with your child/ren or do you hope for more?

SuperBusyMum

Playtime at the Park

Last Sunday, for Mother’s Day, we were off to my brother in law’s for a big family lunch. It was his birthday the Wednesday before, and my Mother in Law’s birthday the week after so it was kind of a big joint celebration. We were at a bit of a loose end that morning though and Monkey was raring to go as always, so we want for a little family stroll and ended up at a local play area. It’s quite funny really as both hubby and I grew up in this area and this park is attached to the primary school we both went to. And some parts of it are exactly as it was 20 odd years ago! Some things have gone, but others are exactly the same, so it brings back a lot of memories.

Anyway, totally sidetracked there, the point of this post is basically to show you how much fun Monkey had monkeying around with his daddy at the playpark! Just lovely to see the pair of them having so much fun together!

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I was obviously there and having fun too but with my current pelvis issues I cannot be running, climbing and messing around quite as much as I would like to be. Which makes it all the more important for Monkey to get this time with daddy!

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Monkey found a gap in the fence and took daddy for an adventure in the woods next to the park..

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Than it was back for more smiles & fun in the park, crawling through tunnels…

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… and walking on his daddy’s feet!

Then Daddy was very impressed to see Monkey sitting on a big boy swing! He is very good at balancing himself and holding on, and he loves it!

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All in all it was just a lovely, impromptu morning of fun in the park 🙂

Country Kids from Coombe Mill Family Farm Holidays Cornwall
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The Reading Residence

A spot of weeding in the sunshine

As the clearance stage of Operation Garden renovation is over, and we are waiting for our contractor to start work on making the garden pretty again, we have been enjoying a bit of a rest from garden stuff. However the front garden has definitely been a bit neglected and is in serious need of some weeding and TLC.

So with the sun out on Saturday we went out for a spot of weeding in the warm weather. Monkey helped a bit too, though mainly he just played in the mud. We didn’t mind him entertaining himself though 🙂

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It was good to see some soil around the plants rather than just weeds!

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It was also lovely to have a good look at some of the plants. There were a few shrubs that we thought hadn’t survived after our long summer last year and the very wet winter, but to our delight even the most dead looking plants have got some beautiful green buds.

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I love the little flowers on this gorgeous shrub too, Spring is well and truly here, hip hip hooray!!

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Unfortunately we have quite a bit more weeding yet to accomplish but we at least made a good start. I’m just looking forward to my bluebells flowering now!!

How does your garden grow?

Mammasaurus and How Does Your Garden Grow?

Family

We are really very lucky as we have all of our immediate family close by. Both of our families are within about a 10 minute drive, in fact most of hubby’s family are within a 10 minute walk! The result is that we see them all very regularly and Monkey has a lovely relationship with both sets of grandparents and all his uncles and aunts.

Hubby's side of the family

Hubby’s side of the family

My Family at my Mum & Step-dad's Wedding in September 2012

My Family at my Mum & Step-dad’s Wedding in September 2012

This is very different from my experience of family growing up. My Mum’s family lived in London, where both my parents grew up. While we all got on well we didn’t see each other anywhere near as often as Monkey sees all of his family! But I do have lots of lovely memories of days out with them, and camping with my aunt and uncle. We spent every Christmas as a family, either in London or at our house, but we were never able to pop in for a cuppa. Every visit was a big event.  

A family picnic for my grandparents Gold Wedding Anniversary

A family picnic for my grandparents Gold Wedding Anniversary in 1991

We always spent Christmas together. This was 1994

Christmas 1994, I was 11 and having a cheeky sip of wine, only lambrusco though! 🙂

My Paternal Grandfather passed away when I was very little and my Granny lived in Australia, I only met her once when she came over for my cousin’s wedding. A cousin who I think I have met twice… My Dad had siblings in the UK and Oz and some other cousins but didn’t have the best relationship with any of them so we really didn’t know them at all. I barely ever even spoke to my “Aussie Gran.” For years I thought she was sending us birthday presents but it turns out it was my lovely mum who bought them the whole time! My Dad has been gone for 7 1/2 years and although my older brother spoke to them shortly after his death, we haven’t heard anything from them for several years.

Aussie Gran with my parents, the one time I met her!

Aussie Gran with my parents, the one time I met her!

I remember friends at school who had lots of cousins and they were all so close. I had friends who could pop round to grandparents houses after school, and it just felt really different to what I knew of family. I’m not trying to say I had a terrible childhood because of this, of course I didn’t, I didn’t know any different and my Mum, my Brothers and I are incredibly close. My lovely Aunty Maggie is still in South London but we try and catch up every couple of months.

There has been times in the past where I have thought about moving away from home. I travelled the world and talked with various friends about living in London, or even emigrating. But, after my Mum survived Breast Cancer the year after my dad died, my heart was never really sold on the idea of leaving my family behind again.

I’m obviously incredibly glad that I stayed, as I met my lovely Hubby who is definitely a family man and he and his family are all incredibly close. I know different things work for different families and I’m not saying this way is better than any other, but it works for us. Some families have little choice in whether they are able to live close to relatives, and distance (or proximity) isn’t the only factor for the closeness of a family. I know of other families with relatives close by who aren’t close at all. Some families don’t get on and don’t want to live close to each other. Different strokes for different folks as they say!

I’m not at all saying one is any better than another. I’m just so glad that Monkey is lucky enough to have such doting family members around him, they all truly adore him and it is lovely to see him interacting with all of them. Hopefully one day he will have some cousins too, though we will see if/when that happens! In the meantime, I am just hugely grateful for all of our family, on both sides and all of the lovely times we share together.

Having lots of fun and cuddles with his family

Monkey having fun and cuddles with lots of his lovely family

The Reading Residence

Monkey is a Daddy’s Boy.

I  know it’s Mother’s day so it may seem ever so slightly odd to be writing about the lovely relationship Monkey has with his Daddy, but as his Mummy I love seeing how close they are. At various points in Monkey’s little life we have struggled with separation anxiety and with him being with me all day every day there has been times where I know Daddy has felt pushed out. I guess it’s inevitable at times that the primary caregiver who is with them, all of the time, is the one they want to be with. But this can be exhausting for said primary caregiver and disappointing to the other parent who loves them no less but who feels a little sidelined. The good news is that they grow up and the separation anxiety usually goes away. Things could not be more different in our house now, as Monkey is very much a Daddy’s boy! When Daddy comes in, even if we have been having a difficult, mardy toddler day, Monkey is all smiles and sunshine and showing off for his daddy. His current insistence is sitting on daddy’s lap for dinner which makes it ever so slightly difficult for daddy to eat. He thought it was cute at first, 50 or so times later it’s a bit annoying! WP_20140217_18_26_04_Pro If he hurts himself, or is tired, it always used to be mummy cuddles that he ran for, and of course when it’s just us he does, but if Daddy and I are both there, it’s the Daddy cuddles he loves the most.

Daddy cuddles

Daddy cuddles

You may think I’d be jealous, but I’m not. I love it. Partly because at the end of the day and I am shattered (even good days are tiring with a toddler let’s be honest) I love that Daddy gets all the attention and to take the reins. I know Daddy is tired too but he puts in so much effort every day, and has done for a long time to make sure his and Monkey’s relationship has got to this point and I know he loves it. I am dead proud of them both. I am also very glad that I am not the one that gets clambered over, even for a little while. This was Monkey and Daddy’s playtime a few evenings ago. Lots of standing on his daddy’s chest, sitting on his knees and then flying on his legs. WP_20140327_18_36_45_Pro WP_20140327_18_36_58_Pro WP_20140327_18_38_42_Pro Basically just enjoying spending time with each other. So lovely to see. WP_20140327_18_37_02_Pro So yes, I know it’s Mother’s day and I “should” be celebrating me and my relationship with Monkey, but this Mummy is just proud of her hubby and little boy and loves the bond that they share. I know how lucky we are for Monkey to have such a good Daddy who wants this kind of relationship with his little boy. Is your little one a mummy or daddy’s boy/girl? theordinarymomentsbadge


Ethans Escapades